From January 27th, 2009 (moving stuff from FB)

The Dating Game: Without dispersing too many painful details, suffice it to say that: I never thought I would end up as “Rose Marie” on the Dick Van Dike Show. For those of you elder enough (??) to remember the classic 60’s TV sitcom, Rose Marie was the eternally single woman with a heart of gold, great talent, but a big mouth. Yup, that’s me. (Minus the woman part…um…you know)

Or maybe more like: Have you ever heard the expression, “Jack of all trades. Master of none?” Perhaps that might be more of an explanation of my continuing failure to find a suitable mate. But the last several years have produced an ever-expanding cadre of women who would run over me with a tractor than see me again. That said, I find it harder and harder as the years go by, to find a woman of quality that:

1. Is not wanted by the law
2. Is not a practicing porn actress
3. Does not have major ex-husband issues
4. Can use the word “men” without spitting on the ground
5. Has some ability to use the English language without the repeated F word
6. Is not practicing clandestine chemistry experiments on herself
7. Has the ability to stand on her own two feet when it comes to economics, social settings and physically (In other words, not so drunk she can’t stand up).

I know it is asking a lot in these days. And I know that I’m no prize buffalo either. I am not rich or tall or handsome (in the traditional sense) or even well-read. But surely there has to be someone out there with me in mind. Someone?

Of course, some of this I believe is laziness on my part. Frankly, right now trying to find a girl is running a good second to lounging in my chair in front of the fireplace, with a good book (or a good old movie) and a cold glass of wine.

I am some mind that it could be a multi-personality thing I’ve always had going on. By day, I’m a computer geek (complete with Star Trek regalia). By night, I’m a homebody. And then on the weekends, a full-blown rock star…complete with groupies and roadies. I guess that would be pretty hard for anyone to live with.

I will say this much; I have noticed lately that I have been recently attracted to some women with graying hair…. I’m not sure what that means. Haha.